A 10 Minute Birthday Manifesto
Today is my birthday and I have 10 minutes before we hit the road and head north. Ten minutes to write a birthday manifesto to myself.
I lived my twenties in fear. Fear of fat. Fear of being swallowed up by depression. Fear of what others thought. Fear of being hurt by people. Fear of who I was. Fear of who I wasn’t. Fear of being abandoned by God.
If someone would have told me 15 years ago as a young adult that this is what my life would look like at 35 years of living, I wouldn’t have believed it. I would not have believed that I would be married for 13 years to my soulmate. I would not have believed I would have two children. I would not have believed I would love homeschooling my children. I would not have believed this gypsy dream would be my life.
Life continued on and with time it carved, like a river through a canyon, a shape of its own. With each passing year, I second guessed less and the box I put life in grew bigger and bigger.
Thirty came and went. It wasn’t so bad. It was great. Great to be alive even if it meant more cellulite.
Yes, there have still been disappointments, hurts, failures, broken dreams, and bad hair days. But I’m alive and my purpose has never felt clearer.
My purpose is to breathe with gratitude for the gifts I don’t deserve. My purpose is to kneel before and be as I am before my Creator. My purpose is to trust that it’s okay. The 5 minutes, 35 years, or whatever my days left may be are there to embrace with every cell of this body and soul of mine.
Life is amazing. Life is a gift. Life is worth living and living well. I haven’t always believed this.
To my younger self, I say thank you. Thank you for opening your heart to others and to God.
To my older self, I say I look forward to meeting you and the adventures we will have.
To my God, I have no words. You are everything. The beginning, the end, and every breath in between.
This year I want to laugh more, risk more, forgive more, wonder more, trust more, and love more.
I want to be a woman running fearlessly barefoot with my hair in the air and a soul full of the Spirit.
Hugs and High Fives,
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Journey with our family on the road at New School Nomads as we travel fulltime in RV through the United States!